I think there's a certain depth that comes from limping through disease, pain, screams, shaking, injections, panic, test results, care-taking, weakness--all of it. I'm sure it will all leave its mark for a while. And not all negative either. The closeness will leave a mark. Like from holding each other so closely you're sure the … Continue reading He’s Reaching For Me In the Dark
It all feels like glass, really. A little too fragile, and I must watch my steps. It seems that life is full of it--glass walls that keep us in, glass doors that keep us out, glass hearts that break all too easily...We live lives made out of glass because the more life we live, the … Continue reading Lives Built of Glass
Our love found us in the middle of our pain. We sat in solid colored chairs against blank walls and waited for the nurses to call my name, over and over and over again. He held my hand during the waiting for the nurses, he rubbed my back during the waiting for the doctors. There … Continue reading Our Pain Found Us In the Middle of Our Love
We grew up going to Minnesota each summer, so whenever we travel to the lake country it feels a lot like traveling home. It's so good to see cousins who are as close as brothers, and family whose support and love is surprising in the best way. Some of the few people who hold our … Continue reading Circle of Protection for the Hurting
Dear Lyme Disease, You've been my closest companion and my greatest enemy. You've taken more than you even know. You've taken experiences, memories, friends, family, and half of my twenties. You've shown me the pangs of rejection, and the fair-weathered friends to go with it. You've introduced me to the sharp balance between wishing and … Continue reading Letter to Lyme Disease
It's crazy how grief will hit in random places. The counselor asked this week how my illness has effected my emotional relationship with my husband. I didn't think it had, because the one great thing that has come from this disease is a much deeper relationship with him. Then I thought back on all our … Continue reading Twisted Memories
Life has a funny way of taking us places we couldn't have dreamed up ourselves, both good and bad. We blaze fast down a track we think we know...and sometimes we do know--our tickets marked clearly with our destination. But sometimes the tracks switch on us and our train gets taken into uncharted zones. Pain … Continue reading The Ride
Our culture shies away from the real, the vulnerable, and the deep. We are much better at the pretty, the easy, and the surface level descriptions of our lives. Our focus is more often on the beautiful flower that blooms than on the long process it took while the plant pushed through the dark. It's … Continue reading Growing Through the Dirt
Tell us through your words, and show us through your actions. We know you're there through you saying "I'm here for you" but ultimately that falls short if we don't see you being here for us. Tons of people have told me this and yet that's the extent of it. Be more specific. The real … Continue reading 12 Things to Do to Show You Support Your Chronically Ill Friend or Family Member
I can't pinpoint the exact moment we met, but I remember your passing me in the hallway in college and catching my eye in the best way. You were energetic and willing, jumped at any chance at a fun activity, and cared immensely for others. We became fast friends and soon best friends over the … Continue reading The Story of Us
